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| The parents carrying the ashes of their sons |
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| The hearse on the way to the crematorium |
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| The grieving parents and a personal note written by the President |
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| About 1000 people turned up for the final wave |
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| Nigel and Donnavan with their warrant officer dad |
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| Friends and strangers left flowers at the accident site |
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| The happier time of the family |
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| Truck drivers are paid by the number of trips they make |
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| Saying goodbye in a teary manner |
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| Young lives gone so soon |
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| Strangers turning up at the funeral |
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| Prayers from all races for Nigel and Donovan |
28 01 2013
News of road accidents always wrench your heart. Lives are snatched without goodbyes and bodies and limbs mangled beyond recognition. Hopes of seeing continuity in the family life-line severed in a second. The victims' loved ones 'died' too. Devoid of feelings, lost for words, dried of tears, aimless in directions and emptied of hopes.
I can't imagine the loss felt by parents when their children can no longer be in their arms, kiss them goodnight or say a prayer before bedtime together. No more shrieks, laughter or running of small feet around the house.
In 1968, I lost two very good and close classmates. Chan, together with her cousin perished immediately under the tyres of a garbage truck. A monster truck against two small bodies. The game was over before the match could even start. We had just finished our National Day dance practice at Jalan Besar Stadium when the accident struck. The news became fodder for the media and for days I kept cutting articles about the tragedy.
It was a rare event of an accident at such scale to happen on those days so the coverage in the national papers was wide. I kept those articles for a long time, taking them out ocassionally until I was able to have a closure and threw them away.
How did I feel about losing two friends, whom for a second I was chatting bubbly with and the next I was wailing for? No right word could be found to aptly describe neither my feelings nor the tumultous emotions that were running amok in my whole system at that very moment.
If I was struggling for words in trying to reconcile my feelings over my friends' death, I would not be able to describe what the parents of Nigel and Donnovan are going through now. I have not been there and pray to God that I would not be there. I am not able to represent how they are feeling. Too painful may be an understatement. Time will heal may not make sense now. Their life had been doomed when they lost their only children prematurely and at a very young age. Tears would be the constant companion.
The public had clamoured for improvements to traffic safety and stronger enforcement against errant drivers and motorists in comments and letters to the media. They were concerned that Nigel and Donnovan had died in vain if not enough is done to protect vulnerable road-users like the brothers.
My heartfelt condolences to Mr and Mrs Yap. Please be strong for one another. Through all this suffering, Mr Yap had forgiven the driver. Mr Yap said that after he had calmed down and thought about it further, he felt ready to forgive the driver as it was "purely an accident, and not a case of hit-and-run".
"After all, he did stop to check what had happened. And he's already 56 years old, maybe even a grandfather. Seeing the devastating scene, I'm sure it was a shock to him too, and it will be something that will be hard for him to forget," said Mr Yap.
"Losing my sons, my heart is broken. Even if I hit, punch or scold him, my children can't come back," Mr Yap indicated, adding that he hopes the driver will "continue to live a happy life and know that I have forgiven him". Mr Yap had so much to give even after going through a loss of such mega scale.
And dear drivers....human bodies are not meant to be mutilated and smashed with metals, especially those of big vehicles.
Drive with care
A loss is hard to bear
NB: Pictures from internet
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