TEARS IN THE RAIN

Me and my sis Maz

Nenek and Zach

Me and Burn's mother who was very teary

Friends bidding Maz goodbye

Mum and her daughters

Jabar and sis-in-law Sirah

Danish and Zach, the preety boy

Sleeping time for Thirah already

What the world needs now is love.....

Wiping away the silent tears

Mum, pray for me that we'll see each other again

Clowning around with The Three Stooges

Don't let him go, grab him tight

Me and niece Afiqah

A family shot before leaving

Burn put on four kilos, especially at the stomach

Hubby was the official video man

Another family shot before Adios

See you soon folks...

The ladies again...to add beauty to Changi Airport

Wide grin, wide girth?

Maz and her ex-colleagues

Mum and Burn's mother. Total age is 152 years old.

We all love you Sis Maz

NO GOODBYE FOR ME

15 Jan 2009

Dear Sis Maz

Where's the 'good' in a goodbye? Why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. I know what I need. I need more hellos.

I consoled myself by saying that goodbyes are not forever nor are they the end.
They simply mean I'll miss you until we meet again! I hope not for too long though. Life is short plus very fragile like our present ecosystem. We cant' waste on too much waiting for the wasted time is time gone....sometimes forever.

Solitude has long since turned brown and withered, sitting bitter in my mouth and heavy in my veins, especially when Dad left us in 1996. The morning he passed away in my lap was the most difficult time of my life. It took me a long time to fill the void in me. Sometimes I felt his presence too much and intense that I refused to believe he was gone. I should'nt be going against God's will and ask him for the reasons why. HE has his reasons for writing the lines of your life. Fortunantely, with a strong family support, normalcy returns though the memories with Dad still form the existing link for me to him.

You know Maz, when there are lines upon my face from a lifetime of smiles, when the time comes to embrace for one long last while, we can laugh about how time really flies, we won't say goodbye, because true love never dies. Saying good-bye isn't the hardest part, it's what we have to leave behind that's hard and unbearable and dreadful. Goodbyes are just like us taking extended leaves of absences from each other. There will be moments when we see each other again...but with gaps in between before the next meeting.

I have learnt to be harsh on myself when it comes to missing the ones you love. I punish myself by burying myself on the pillows. I hardened myself by alienating from the source of the love at times. I've reminded myself numerous times that missing someone gets easier everyday. Because, even though it is one day further from the last time you saw each other, it is one day closer to the next time you will meet again.

The memories we had of your visit this time would be still fresh in my mind till we meet again to renew and make more memories. We had many joyous times and great laughter. This time round we were able to do a lot of things together and in full force. How wonderful was it to see all the family rallying behind all the activities we had just to bind and gel the children and us together.

Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose. We hugged and cried because there was so much that we did not want to let go. So Maz and Burn...that's how I felt when you departed through the door of the departure hall, with only memories forming the thread to our existence and which would hold us together.

And memory is the diary that we all carry about with us and when we miss that someone, we just leave a page to refresh the moments we had cherished, the times of your life...the experiences that would fill your chapter of life. And I just can't wait to close the book so that we will be together again.....

A poem for you dear Maz

The hardest thing to do in life is say goodbye

Today I learned a lesson
That will always be true
Saying goodbye to someone
Is the hardest thing to do

I've never felt a loss
Until I said goodbye
I thought I was strong
But I broke down and cried

Never will I forget
The times we had
Though the reflections are happy
They make me rather melancholy

The most brutal of men
cried at the past

For their heart had melted in tears
What about me?

Swath in silk and not metal

So tears are my comfort

I only wish
the good times would last
So I humor myself
I'd smile if I could
Why can't things last forever?
Because life isn't supposed to be that good

Your smiles still linger
Your hugs still warm
And like a beatiful rainbow after a thunder
I will treasure the moments we possess

Love
Sis Zizi